At the beginning of the course, we were asked to consider the definition of creative nonfiction. We were asked that several times, actually, to the extent that I began to dread the question. At the time, it seemed like almost anything could be creative nonfiction; however, now I realize that the generalization is not quite correct. I believe I was not making enough of a distinction between subject and style. After reading many examples of the genre, what I would now say is that creative nonfiction is an attempt to understand a particular subject, which can be an event, person, or idea, by examining it and relating to it through a combination of personal experience and objective observation. The question of whether or not something is creative nonfiction becomes one of technique.
When this class first met, there would have been almost no way I could have written anything that I thought was creative nonfiction. I am still not entirely convinced, though I believe I have made several strides toward that goal. The body of writing that was required for this course was daunting. We wrote journal entries from prompts in most of the classes for the first two months, which was surprisingly difficult for me. I never felt that I was producing anything worthy of being read aloud, whereas my classmates’ journal entries seemed to be much deeper and more evocative of whatever the prompt called for. I wondered if I was able to make it in this course, if I were able to be honest enough with myself.
I decided that wading in slowly was not the way to approach this course. My first essay, on my problems with anger, mined my darkest thoughts and laid them out for people to see. Once I dove in, the remaining essays became much easier. The second essay I wrote, on my lifelong love of role-playing games and the positive effects it has had on my life. It was fun to reflect on various experiences of role-playing. In revising that essay, I incorporated more of the techniques we studied during the semester, namely segmentation and objective study. I am particularly proud of the third essay, even though I know it needs an actual conclusion and ending. That essay is on a topic I truly care about and think about frequently. In terms of technique, the third essay was heavily influenced by John McPhee’s essay “The Search for Marvin Gardens”. While I struggled with the fourth essay, writing first one and then another draft, I feel that the finished product accomplished something different from any of the previous essays. Now at the end of the course, I feel that I have a better understanding of how to go about constructing a creative nonfiction essay.
The revision process has been something of a challenge. I think my main challenge is trying to disassociate myself from what are very personal topics. It is almost contradictory, or perhaps counter-intuitive, to look at these types of essays so objectively that I can analyze them. I think that the only answer for this is practice. Such analysis of others’ examples will likely help me in revising my own work as well.
The blog was another struggle for me. Just as I was uncomfortable sharing work in class, so too am I uncomfortable with posting anything on the web, especially as there was no way I could limit access. Posting that first essay, on anger, on a blog that theoretically anyone could view was a giant leap for me. I still have some reservations about posting on a blog. I wonder whether there may be legal issues with trying to publish something in print that I previously published on a blog. Still, now that I have grown in confidence I feel better about the blog, and I am thinking of continuing it or creating a new one once the class is over.
I think the main benefit of this course has been to increase my confidence in my abilities as a writer, which have been long underused. Most of the issues that I had at the beginning of the course, including blog posting and prompt reading in class, can be traced back to this lack of confidence. The continued studies of various professional pieces, the practice of writing during the semester, and the reflective comments from the professor and classmates have all helped to increase my confidence in my writing abilities. I expect to continue writing these kinds of essays, for personal pleasure if nothing else, long beyond the end of this course.
No comments:
Post a Comment