This is Character Creation
Roll four six-sided dice. Take the three highest numbers and add them together, and write that amount down. Repeat this process six more times. Throw out the lowest number. The remaining six are your ability scores: strength, dexterity, constitution, intelligence, wisdom, and charisma. These scores will modify every action in the game; they will define how good a character is at what he does. This is the first step of character creation.
Gaming, especially the role-playing kind, has become one of the rituals of my life. In high school, it ruled every Friday afternoon from the time school ended until perhaps seven in the evening. For those four hours each week, we pretended to be all kinds of different people. It was where I met my closest friends in high school, which is interesting because we forged our friendships not as ourselves but as a variety of characters.
Actually, thinking back on it, my love of playing someone else began earlier. As children, my sisters and I invented our own games. We made the rules, and adapted them as we saw fit. We even game our games names: “Magic People” was a game where we each picked an object – a broom, a snow globe, a strange little sandstone pyramid paperweight – and that was the source of our magical powers. For this game, the porch was a castle keep, the sidewalk and the walkway to the house were river and moat, and the pieces of shale that crossed the lawn were small islands. The garden on the side of the house was the jungle, tiger lilies on one side and dogwood on the other, both overgrown, overreaching the path to the backyard. The side of the house required slightly less imagination. We would jump around and go on adventures, holding our magic in our hands, from the safety of our front lawn.
“You can sense that the dead paladin’s soul is trapped within that well of darkness,” Bob tells me. Bob is the DM for this session. He just threw a small horde of zombies at our party, and one of our members died in the battle. He was a paladin; paladin’s are the game’s most righteous defenders of law and good. They are required by their beliefs to attack all evil wherever they find it. To this end, they have many abilities that enhance their defenses, but the sheer number of zombies was too much, and this poor paladin died doing his duty.
“Is it true?” Fred’s character is asking me this, because as a cleric of his order he has put his faith in me. “Does my brother’s soul remain trapped here?” He looks at me for an answer.
After generating ability scores, pick which class the character will start out having. This choice is as important, if not more so, than the ability scores themselves, because most of the abilities a character has come from the options provided by his class. A rogue has a moderate attack bonus, prefers skills that allow her to move around the battlefield without drawing attacks, and deals extra damage when she can stab an enemy (or friend) from behind. She battles with her high dexterity and intelligence, picking her targets carefully. The barbarian has a good attack bonus, many hit points, and ability to enter a rage to gain even more strength and hit points; he rushes in swinging. Barbarians favor strength and constitution, the hallmarks of physical classes. The arcane casters – wizards, sorcerers, bards – need high scores in intelligence or charisma. They stand back from the main battle, using spells to benefit their allies and attack their enemies. Clerics rely on wisdom and heavy armor, can heal, and have a moderate attack bonus. Clerics can play almost any role they want, but usually they act as their deity prefers.
As I said, I’m a cleric, a member of the paladin’s religious order. Normally, a party member’s death casts a pall over the group, but this is different. This death was worse because Abi and Fred, two players, had decided that their characters, both paladins, would be brothers. Now Abi’s character is dead, and Fred’s character is especially bereft. What makes it worse is that a particularly powerful being controls this massive cemetery, and he has somehow prevented the dead paladin’s soul from reaching its final reward. And now I know.
I think about this. The evil guy on the throne, probably some kind of undead himself, has offered to trade the dead paladin’s soul for the living paladin’s, and Fred is just the sort of player who would accept that offer for his dead brother’s sake. But that wouldn’t really serve the party, and we’re going to have to fight the evil guy anyway. So what do I do?
Thinking back, I don’t remember being particularly unsatisfied with my childhood. I think I played these games, which despite an inability to modify the characters, are still role-playing games, out of simple enjoyment. They were easy to love. The character has a well-defined quest to complete, usually before a great evil takes over the world, and a sword and other tools with which to complete that quest. Along the way are numerous baddies trying to stop him, which the hero can defeat with a little deduction and practice.
Such easily defined goals had immense appeal to me. As I got older, and began to interact with my classmates at a more adult level, I began to realize that there were things that were different about the way I viewed things. I was raised in a religious household, and the restrictive views of my parents and church kept me from many of the things that could have formed the basis for forming friendships. I had never been allowed to participate in sports activities, for example, because these were usually held on weekends, and I would not have been able to miss church on Sunday mornings. Or Sunday nights, for that matter. Or any of the other times that my parents felt that a child should be there, participating in church activities. Not being able to discuss sports presented a real roadblock to popularity, and so I felt apart. There were other reasons as well, that would become even more significant as I got older, but those were not apparent yet. At least, not to me.
The social challenges were beyond me at this stage; however, where I lacked skill in the actual world, I was still able to overcome challenges and finish quests in the virtual worlds. These virtual worlds became even more of a draw for me, and I remember spending hours playing the original Final Fantasy, Dragon Warrior, and Crystalis games for the Nintendo. Super Nintendo brought me gems such as Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past, the Secret of Mana, and Final Fantasy II (or IV for purists), which is still one of my all-time favorites. Games like these helped me through some awkward transitional years. I had questions about sexuality, what mine was, and whether it fit in with both popular opinion and religious belief. I didn’t like the thought that I might be different, and turned to video games as a means of avoiding, or at least postponing the questions.
In the game, I’m trying to postpone a different question. “You know where your brother’s soul would go when he died. Why do you believe the evil words of this fiend?” Or something like that. I’m trying to remain true to my character, but I have ulterior motives. We all do. And this is a classic Bob-style moral dilemma, so naturally there is no simple solution.
Choose your feats and assign your skill points next. Feats are abilities that enhance or specialize other class abilities. They allow characters to attack more frequently, give them ways to avoid damage, or allow them to change the way a spell effect goes off. If you’re ever unsure, a good first choice is Dodge, which gives a one point bonus to Armor Class. That is useful for any class; no one wants to get hit by an attack. After that, it’s best to choose feats that enhance the way you prefer to play.
Skills are things the character has learned over the course of her training and adventuring. Some skills are various types of knowledge: religion, history, arcana, etc. These skills are modified by the mental stats, intelligence mainly. Having one of these at the right moment can get a party moving in the right direction or tell them something that they could never otherwise find out. Other skills are physical: acrobatics, climb, stealth, swimming. These skills rely on the physical stats, usually dexterity or strength. Not having one of these when a character needs it can mean death. While having a good score in the appropriate ability can help, a balanced distribution of skill points is essential to a character’s success as an adventurer. Adventurers who haven’t thought out their skill selection end up stumbling around waiting for somebody to come along and help them, slowing down a party immeasurably.
My real problem began when I got out of high school. The people with whom I had been playing went off to college, and I stayed local, and then started working. Somewhere along the way I stopped playing games. I stopped role-playing because I couldn’t find a group of people to play with, and I stopped playing video games because I was working and trying to save money for school. I don’t want to give the impression that I was alone and lonesome; I had friends, and an entirely too active social life. But it was a life that I absorbed from the friends I was hanging around with at the time. I went clubbing frequently, and as one of my best friends loved movies passionately, I saw almost every movie that came out in theaters.
The closest I got to role-playing during this period was seeing the Dungeons & Dragons movie in theaters, and that was a less than stellar experience. Two of my friends left in the middle of it, and another fell asleep. I couldn’t exactly blame them; it was not a well-crafted movie. Still, I noticed the little things that were clever or well done, like the beholder. It was a moment of realization for me: this group of people couldn’t understand where I had come from, or what I really enjoyed.
It took a long time for me to realize that I wasn’t happy. I am somewhat ashamed to say I took it out on my friends in ways I didn’t even realize were unhappiness. Looking back at this time, I realize that I didn’t really have anything in common with the particular group of people. I didn’t listen to the same music they did. They weren’t big readers like I was. I had some common ground with video games, but only with a few of them, and none at all really with my “best” friend. I wonder now if I was myself at all with them. I think this is also when I started having outbursts and mood swings, which turned out to be signs of a larger problem than I realized at first. My relationships grew strained, and then, out of convenience and mutual desire, ended.
After assigning skills, find out how much gold you start with, and then go shopping. Equipment is a character’s lifeblood. Characters purchase their starting weapons and armor, and then pick up more as they quest around their world. The search for obscure or powerful equipment can drive entire storylines. For a starting character, the class determines what types of armor and weapons may be equipped. Fighters may use any weapon and armor: bastard sword, large shield, scale mail. Rogues favor light armors and fast, light weapons: leather armor, dagger, short sword. Clerics may not use edged weapons unless their deity specifically allows it, but are not restricted in armor: heavy mace, plate armor. The arcane casters, wizards and sorcerers, may not use any armor; it interferes with their delicate casting. Their long training in magic has kept them from learning to wield weapons, so they may use only the most simple. If you’re the wizard, you wear clothes, you buy a dagger, and you hope you never need to use it.
Pick up some utility equipment too: A backpack, a bedroll, torches, flint and steel, trail rations, a waterskin, and rope. Always, always buy some rope. It’s my cardinal rule. The rest is up to personal preference, but these are things no adventurer should ever be without. After all, his equipment is an adventurer’s best friend.
In the game, Fred, Tom, Ivan, and Bob are staring at me as I try to figure out the right way to answer this question. It’s amazing how much of an effect my next few lines of dialogue will have on the way this entire segment of the adventure plays out. We’re talking about character death here. I know I can’t lie outright; I am a cleric of a good deity, who would frown on such a tactic. Still, there must be something I can do to get around the whole truth.
“Brother Cleric,” Fred says quietly, “do not delay. If my brother’s soul is indeed trapped here, I must do what I can to free him.” As a player, he knows. He was at the table when Bob told me what I found out. It’s a testament to his willingness to role-play that he is drawing this out. His actions will be based not on the truth, but on what I say.
I look at Tom. Tom is the rogue in this endeavor. Actually, Tom is the rogue pretty much all the time, even when he’s not technically playing one, and even when we’re not playing a game, for that matter. But here he’s not even trying to play against type. He meets my eye, and I can see he knows that we’re going to end up fighting regardless. Ivan, the other cleric, is already thinking about what spells to cast in what order. Fred knows that we need to defeat Evil Guy, but he is a good role-player; if I tell him the whole truth, Fred’s character will give himself to Evil Guy, and we’ll pretty much be sunk. Two clerics and a rogue might be able to take down a powerful, evil undead, but it’s much easier with a paladin to engage it directly.
There came a period when I wasn’t really hanging out with anyone. By merest chance, this period of exile ended at work one day when a coworker noticed me reading through a role-playing game manual that had come in. I hadn’t played anything in years, and in the time I had been away the game had changed greatly. I don’t even remember why I was reading this particular manual. I think it was simply to have something to read on a break. My coworker noticed and asked me if I played, and I replied that I had in high school. From then on, she tried on numerous occasions to get met o come over to her gaming group. For whatever reason, I resisted, until a particular event made the offer too convenient to ignore.
In many ways, I owe my current group of friends to J.K. Rowling and her “Harry Potter” books. I was managing a bookstore, and the release of the fifth book meant that I had to work all weekend, instead of having Sundays off as I normally would. Sundays were when this particular gaming group met to play, and as I was going to be in the area anyway, I said I would come by to meet everyone. And I did. And I kept coming, and have almost every Sunday since.
This group of people was a revelation in many ways. They were adults, raised largely in an urban area, and as capable of navigating their actual environment as they were the imagined environments we shared. They weren’t socially inept or introverted; they didn’t stay holed up in their rooms unless they wanted to be. They accepted my not just because of my interest in playing, but because that is the kind of people they are, and we’ve grown together over the last seven years or so.
The last step is to give yourself a name, a physical description, and an alignment. Alignment indicates whether you are good or evil, lawful or chaotic. Do you follow the law of the land or the ideals of a religious belief? Do you do what you want regardless of the consequences? Do you want people to smile at your name, or would you prefer they run in fear at the sound? Your alignment is the way you live your life. The choices you make for your character should be made with your alignment in mind.
In the game, I’m Neutral Good. I have a little wiggle room there. Being “Good” on the moral axis means that I cannot take evil actions. I must not cause undue pain or torture, attack people who don’t deserve it, steal candy from babies, kick old ladies in the street, etc. On the ethical axis, I am “Neutral”. This means that I can take either “Lawful” or “Chaotic” actions so long as I strive for balance. Were I “Lawful” I would have to tell the truth, the whole truth, so help me whichever deity I follow. But a little white lie here seems appropriate, as it will allow us the opportunity to attack the evil guy and free this area from his influence. And that’s an overall good act. Or at least that’s what I tell myself.
Tom’s character has his daggers out. Ivan has decided on his spells. Fred is still waiting for me to decide his character’s fate.
I end up answering with a question of my own, one that plays on the paladin’s pride and faith. “Do you think this creature’s evil is powerful enough to bar a holy paladin’s soul from communion with his deity? Have faith in the power of Pelor, brother paladin.” My character walks over to him and says a prayer, and that prayer just happens to be a spell of Protection from Evil, which I know Fred’s character will need. Fred’s character tells Evil Guy that he will not accept the deal. With that, Evil Guy attacks, and the battle begins.
This is a part of my new gaming ritual; the Sunday evening gaming that started before I met this group, and will hopefully continue for as long as we all enjoy gaming. For four hours every Sunday evening, we pretend to be powerful spell caster, daring warrior, and skillful rogues. Well, generally we leave the rogue to Tom. I am comfortable here. I know that Wilson will always go for the toughest thing on the board first. I can count on Tom to pick his targets wisely, and on Frank not to. I know that if I need to cast and Tom or Wilson are in the area of effect, it’s okay, they don’t mind being brought back to life later. Though our alignments might be slightly different, we form a good party, in gaming and in life.
Monday, December 13, 2010
"Eye" Essay - Final Revision
“Excuse me, sir. I was wondering if I could ask you about a question about a magazine.”
“Of course, ma’am,” I reply. Helping customers with questions is, after all, one of the reasons I’m here.
“I see this issue on the shelf, but it’s a few months old. Is there a newer one?”
“Well,” I tell her, “it’s difficult to tell with magazines, because we don’t list them in the computer the same way we list books, but of course I’ll try.” In looking the magazine up in the database, it seems like there should be a newer issue. Going over to the shelf, though, the magazine isn’t there. “This is not that unusual,” I explain. “It may have sold out, or perhaps a few of the copies came in damaged,” I say. This seems to be a normal customer interaction, up until…now.
“Well, sir, I was wondering if there is any way I could get a discount on this issue, since it’s older.” I look at the magazine again. It is in good condition. It doesn’t look like it has ever been handled before.
“Excuse me, ma’am,” I say, “I’m not sure I follow.”
“Well, you said yourself that there is a newer issue out. Should I have to pay full price for this old one?”
I reply, with growing incredulity, “Well, ma’am, the magazine is still full of articles that contain useful information. The new issue would simply have different articles. I can’t really offer a discount because it isn’t the current issue.” After all, it isn’t exactly going stale. Only I don’t say that last part, naturally.
“Is that your store policy,” she asks.
“Is what our store policy, ma’am? Charging the listed price on the merchandise we sell? Yes, ma’am, that is our store policy”.
“Is there anyone else I can speak to about this?”
“You are welcome to speak to the store manager, though he is not in today. But yes, I would be happy to take your name and number so he can contact you about this issue.”
Such is one instance in the life of a retail sales person. What is it about shopping that makes people check their brains at the door? Customers seem to have the idea that whenever they are out in public, there are no rules for their interactions with other people. Yes, there is an open invitation into the store. We don’t discriminate; we are a Place of Public Accommodation; however, this is no one’s home, so please don’t act as though it were. It is impossible to clean up immediately after every single customer that walks in. Likewise, we cannot always watch over every square foot of the store at all times, so please, put that child’s shoes back on her, and perhaps your own as well. Thanks so much. It is a safety issue, you see. Also it is somewhat disgusting to think about. Except I could never say that.
Perhaps, like the child covering his own eyes and thinking nobody can see him, customers believe that where they gather no permanent impressions they also leave none behind. It might come as a great surprise to some to know that they persist in our collective memories much longer than their visit to the store persists in their own mind. I can only wonder if they would do some of the things they do. No, we are not a library, but does that conversation need to be yelled into a cell phone so loudly the entire store can hear it? Probably not, and particularly not when it sounds like an episode of some soap opera. Who is sleeping with whom? And whom else? Never mind. I don’t really want to know, and most likely no one else here does either.
It has never ceased to amaze me how little concern people show for things that are not theirs. I understand that people coming in aren’t all looking to purchase. Window shopping and browsing around are things I enjoy. We like to maintain a depth and breadth of stock commensurate with the interest of our shopping public. Yes, we have about twelve different travel guides to the state of Hawaii. Was it really necessary to take one of each over to the café to browse through? How long was it going to take to go through them all? And did the one that the coffee dripped on have to be hidden in the middle of the pile? We found it, of course. We always do.
The real estate market may be difficult outside, but inside the store, it’s an outright war. Unquestionably, the first customers into the store will go right to the café to pick out their preferred tables, where they will leave their belongings and then go browse around the store. Other customers stake out the comfy-chairs like homesteaders during the Oklahoma land rush. Consider this instance. “Manager to Customer Service,” the overhead said. Oh, I thought, they’re playing my song. Walking over, I see an older customer looking unhappy. In introduce myself, and ask how I may be of assistance.
“I want you to call the police.”
“Well, ma’am, could you please give me a few more details? That isn’t something I do lightly,” I explain.
“I put my things down on one of the chairs over by the magazines and then went to look around, and when I came back someone had moved them and was sitting in the chair. I want you to call the police and have her arrested.”
“Well, ma’am, that is not exactly something I can get involved in”, thinking of what the police will say if I call them for this. “It doesn’t affect the store in any way, since it’s between two customers”, I tell her. This is not exactly true, but this woman seems to be a few chips shy of a batch of cookies anyway, and I would simply prefer to diffuse the situation. “We don’t take responsibility for items that customers leave unattended”, I continue. “That really is the customer’s responsibility alone.” The customer walked away, somewhat unhappy, but calmed. Besides, if you knew how many of those comfy chairs we’ve thrown away because people had “accidents” in them, you probably wouldn’t want to sit there anyway. I probably should have said that, for her own sake, but I didn’t.
The store also becomes a battleground between opposing political ideologies. This happens regularly. It would be impossible to stop. It’s particularly bad during an election year, when publishers rush out any book they can dealing with the political upheavals approaching, and it manifests in two ways. The first issue stems from the customers’ unfailing belief that, even though a book is a bestseller and all their friends are talking about it, they are going to be the only person looking for it on any given day. Of course, it should be in stock, and for their convenience displayed right at the front of the store. This has the potential of happening with any book, but it’s much more fun when it happens with a political book. When it’s a political book, not having it on-hand means that we are obviously supporting the left/right-wing agenda, and are bleeding-heart liberals/neo-fascist conservatives, and so forth and so on. What customers tend to forget in these instances is that we are a business. We would sell almost anything that a customer was interested in purchasing. Actually, we don’t have the book because our initial shipment sold out faster than we could be resupplied. While we’re on the topic of political books, it does no good to hide the books written from opposing political views by covering them up with other books. Yes, there are a number of books out now with President Obama’s face on the cover. They aren’t all pro-Obama. Hiding them all behind the new Michael Savage or Bill O’Reilly book is pointless. We know we didn’t face-out those books in five different places. We will figure out what happened, and demean the culprit in absentia for doing it.
Political and social prejudices manifest themselves in other ways in the bookstore. Where books are placed in the store is very important to some customers. Also, what books are next to them becomes an issue. I will never forget the customer who was upset that the African-American Studies section was located next to the Gay & Lesbian Studies section.
“Why is this section here?” she asked.
“We try to keep similar topics together, ma’am, and so all of the sections that deal with special-interest groups are follow one another. See, it goes from History, into Current Affairs, into Cultural Studies, African-American Studies, Gay & Lesbian Studies, Women’s Studies, Asian Studies, Hispanic Studies, Native American Studies, etc”.
“Well, I don’t think it should be here”, she replied, as though hers should be the final word, and walked off. Where should we put it ma’am? The back of the bus…I mean store? Of course I didn’t say that.
Returns are always an issue. Our return policy is simple: only within two weeks, only with a receipt, only in saleable condition. If the item does not meet any one of those conditions, we are not obligated to take back the return. To be sure, we make exceptions. Life is full of unusual and difficult circumstances, and yes, we are humans too; however, we do assume that people who shop in a bookstore have some ability to read, and thus could read the return policy for themselves. As it turns out, that assumption is sometimes incorrect. Some interpretations have been particularly interesting. One customer insisted that the policy was worded in such a way that she needed only to have a receipt or come in within the stated time-period to get the refund. When I spelled out for her exactly what the wording meant, she replied that she had a college degree, and knew that it meant what she had insisted upon. We went back and forth for several minutes as I tried to explain certain basic grammatical rules to her, but she insisted on her reading. Finally, I gave up. Okay ma’am, we will do this return for you; but, just so you know, you are wrong. And yes, that was what really what I said.
My favorite customer interaction happened quite a while ago. This customer was pleasant, and had a simple request. She came up and asked, “Excuse me, but do you have any books on the meaning of names?” Well, yes, ma’am, we do. We have a whole section of books for baby names, I replied, and I turned to show her the way. “Well”, she continued behind me, “do you have any books with adult names?” Thankfully, I was facing away, because it was all I could do not to laugh. And for once, I couldn’t think of anything to say.
“Of course, ma’am,” I reply. Helping customers with questions is, after all, one of the reasons I’m here.
“I see this issue on the shelf, but it’s a few months old. Is there a newer one?”
“Well,” I tell her, “it’s difficult to tell with magazines, because we don’t list them in the computer the same way we list books, but of course I’ll try.” In looking the magazine up in the database, it seems like there should be a newer issue. Going over to the shelf, though, the magazine isn’t there. “This is not that unusual,” I explain. “It may have sold out, or perhaps a few of the copies came in damaged,” I say. This seems to be a normal customer interaction, up until…now.
“Well, sir, I was wondering if there is any way I could get a discount on this issue, since it’s older.” I look at the magazine again. It is in good condition. It doesn’t look like it has ever been handled before.
“Excuse me, ma’am,” I say, “I’m not sure I follow.”
“Well, you said yourself that there is a newer issue out. Should I have to pay full price for this old one?”
I reply, with growing incredulity, “Well, ma’am, the magazine is still full of articles that contain useful information. The new issue would simply have different articles. I can’t really offer a discount because it isn’t the current issue.” After all, it isn’t exactly going stale. Only I don’t say that last part, naturally.
“Is that your store policy,” she asks.
“Is what our store policy, ma’am? Charging the listed price on the merchandise we sell? Yes, ma’am, that is our store policy”.
“Is there anyone else I can speak to about this?”
“You are welcome to speak to the store manager, though he is not in today. But yes, I would be happy to take your name and number so he can contact you about this issue.”
Such is one instance in the life of a retail sales person. What is it about shopping that makes people check their brains at the door? Customers seem to have the idea that whenever they are out in public, there are no rules for their interactions with other people. Yes, there is an open invitation into the store. We don’t discriminate; we are a Place of Public Accommodation; however, this is no one’s home, so please don’t act as though it were. It is impossible to clean up immediately after every single customer that walks in. Likewise, we cannot always watch over every square foot of the store at all times, so please, put that child’s shoes back on her, and perhaps your own as well. Thanks so much. It is a safety issue, you see. Also it is somewhat disgusting to think about. Except I could never say that.
Perhaps, like the child covering his own eyes and thinking nobody can see him, customers believe that where they gather no permanent impressions they also leave none behind. It might come as a great surprise to some to know that they persist in our collective memories much longer than their visit to the store persists in their own mind. I can only wonder if they would do some of the things they do. No, we are not a library, but does that conversation need to be yelled into a cell phone so loudly the entire store can hear it? Probably not, and particularly not when it sounds like an episode of some soap opera. Who is sleeping with whom? And whom else? Never mind. I don’t really want to know, and most likely no one else here does either.
It has never ceased to amaze me how little concern people show for things that are not theirs. I understand that people coming in aren’t all looking to purchase. Window shopping and browsing around are things I enjoy. We like to maintain a depth and breadth of stock commensurate with the interest of our shopping public. Yes, we have about twelve different travel guides to the state of Hawaii. Was it really necessary to take one of each over to the café to browse through? How long was it going to take to go through them all? And did the one that the coffee dripped on have to be hidden in the middle of the pile? We found it, of course. We always do.
The real estate market may be difficult outside, but inside the store, it’s an outright war. Unquestionably, the first customers into the store will go right to the café to pick out their preferred tables, where they will leave their belongings and then go browse around the store. Other customers stake out the comfy-chairs like homesteaders during the Oklahoma land rush. Consider this instance. “Manager to Customer Service,” the overhead said. Oh, I thought, they’re playing my song. Walking over, I see an older customer looking unhappy. In introduce myself, and ask how I may be of assistance.
“I want you to call the police.”
“Well, ma’am, could you please give me a few more details? That isn’t something I do lightly,” I explain.
“I put my things down on one of the chairs over by the magazines and then went to look around, and when I came back someone had moved them and was sitting in the chair. I want you to call the police and have her arrested.”
“Well, ma’am, that is not exactly something I can get involved in”, thinking of what the police will say if I call them for this. “It doesn’t affect the store in any way, since it’s between two customers”, I tell her. This is not exactly true, but this woman seems to be a few chips shy of a batch of cookies anyway, and I would simply prefer to diffuse the situation. “We don’t take responsibility for items that customers leave unattended”, I continue. “That really is the customer’s responsibility alone.” The customer walked away, somewhat unhappy, but calmed. Besides, if you knew how many of those comfy chairs we’ve thrown away because people had “accidents” in them, you probably wouldn’t want to sit there anyway. I probably should have said that, for her own sake, but I didn’t.
The store also becomes a battleground between opposing political ideologies. This happens regularly. It would be impossible to stop. It’s particularly bad during an election year, when publishers rush out any book they can dealing with the political upheavals approaching, and it manifests in two ways. The first issue stems from the customers’ unfailing belief that, even though a book is a bestseller and all their friends are talking about it, they are going to be the only person looking for it on any given day. Of course, it should be in stock, and for their convenience displayed right at the front of the store. This has the potential of happening with any book, but it’s much more fun when it happens with a political book. When it’s a political book, not having it on-hand means that we are obviously supporting the left/right-wing agenda, and are bleeding-heart liberals/neo-fascist conservatives, and so forth and so on. What customers tend to forget in these instances is that we are a business. We would sell almost anything that a customer was interested in purchasing. Actually, we don’t have the book because our initial shipment sold out faster than we could be resupplied. While we’re on the topic of political books, it does no good to hide the books written from opposing political views by covering them up with other books. Yes, there are a number of books out now with President Obama’s face on the cover. They aren’t all pro-Obama. Hiding them all behind the new Michael Savage or Bill O’Reilly book is pointless. We know we didn’t face-out those books in five different places. We will figure out what happened, and demean the culprit in absentia for doing it.
Political and social prejudices manifest themselves in other ways in the bookstore. Where books are placed in the store is very important to some customers. Also, what books are next to them becomes an issue. I will never forget the customer who was upset that the African-American Studies section was located next to the Gay & Lesbian Studies section.
“Why is this section here?” she asked.
“We try to keep similar topics together, ma’am, and so all of the sections that deal with special-interest groups are follow one another. See, it goes from History, into Current Affairs, into Cultural Studies, African-American Studies, Gay & Lesbian Studies, Women’s Studies, Asian Studies, Hispanic Studies, Native American Studies, etc”.
“Well, I don’t think it should be here”, she replied, as though hers should be the final word, and walked off. Where should we put it ma’am? The back of the bus…I mean store? Of course I didn’t say that.
Returns are always an issue. Our return policy is simple: only within two weeks, only with a receipt, only in saleable condition. If the item does not meet any one of those conditions, we are not obligated to take back the return. To be sure, we make exceptions. Life is full of unusual and difficult circumstances, and yes, we are humans too; however, we do assume that people who shop in a bookstore have some ability to read, and thus could read the return policy for themselves. As it turns out, that assumption is sometimes incorrect. Some interpretations have been particularly interesting. One customer insisted that the policy was worded in such a way that she needed only to have a receipt or come in within the stated time-period to get the refund. When I spelled out for her exactly what the wording meant, she replied that she had a college degree, and knew that it meant what she had insisted upon. We went back and forth for several minutes as I tried to explain certain basic grammatical rules to her, but she insisted on her reading. Finally, I gave up. Okay ma’am, we will do this return for you; but, just so you know, you are wrong. And yes, that was what really what I said.
My favorite customer interaction happened quite a while ago. This customer was pleasant, and had a simple request. She came up and asked, “Excuse me, but do you have any books on the meaning of names?” Well, yes, ma’am, we do. We have a whole section of books for baby names, I replied, and I turned to show her the way. “Well”, she continued behind me, “do you have any books with adult names?” Thankfully, I was facing away, because it was all I could do not to laugh. And for once, I couldn’t think of anything to say.
Reflective Analysis - Revised
At the beginning of the course, we were asked to consider the definition of creative nonfiction. We were asked that several times, actually, to the extent that I began to dread the question. At the time, it seemed like almost anything could be creative nonfiction; however, now I realize that the generalization is not quite correct. I believe I was not making enough of a distinction between subject and style. After reading many examples of the genre, what I would now say is that creative nonfiction is an attempt to understand a particular subject, which can be an event, person, or idea, by examining it and relating to it through a combination of personal experience and objective observation. The question of whether or not something is creative nonfiction becomes one of technique.
When this class first met, there would have been almost no way I could have written anything that I thought was creative nonfiction. I am still not entirely convinced, though I believe I have made several strides toward that goal. The body of writing that was required for this course was daunting. We wrote journal entries from prompts in most of the classes for the first two months, which was surprisingly difficult for me. I never felt that I was producing anything worthy of being read aloud, whereas my classmates’ journal entries seemed to be much deeper and more evocative of whatever the prompt called for. I wondered if I was able to make it in this course, if I were able to be honest enough with myself.
I decided that wading in slowly was not the way to approach this course. My first essay, on my problems with anger, mined my darkest thoughts and laid them out for people to see. Once I dove in, the remaining essays became much easier. The second essay I wrote, on my lifelong love of role-playing games and the positive effects it has had on my life. It was fun to reflect on various experiences of role-playing. In revising that essay, I incorporated more of the techniques we studied during the semester, namely segmentation and objective study. I am particularly proud of the third essay, even though I know it needs an actual conclusion and ending. That essay is on a topic I truly care about and think about frequently. In terms of technique, the third essay was heavily influenced by John McPhee’s essay “The Search for Marvin Gardens”. While I struggled with the fourth essay, writing first one and then another draft, I feel that the finished product accomplished something different from any of the previous essays. Now at the end of the course, I feel that I have a better understanding of how to go about constructing a creative nonfiction essay.
The revision process has been something of a challenge. I think my main challenge is trying to disassociate myself from what are very personal topics. It is almost contradictory, or perhaps counter-intuitive, to look at these types of essays so objectively that I can analyze them. I think that the only answer for this is practice. Such analysis of others’ examples will likely help me in revising my own work as well.
The blog was another struggle for me. Just as I was uncomfortable sharing work in class, so too am I uncomfortable with posting anything on the web, especially as there was no way I could limit access. Posting that first essay, on anger, on a blog that theoretically anyone could view was a giant leap for me. I still have some reservations about posting on a blog. I wonder whether there may be legal issues with trying to publish something in print that I previously published on a blog. Still, now that I have grown in confidence I feel better about the blog, and I am thinking of continuing it or creating a new one once the class is over.
I think the main benefit of this course has been to increase my confidence in my abilities as a writer, which have been long underused. Most of the issues that I had at the beginning of the course, including blog posting and prompt reading in class, can be traced back to this lack of confidence. The continued studies of various professional pieces, the practice of writing during the semester, and the reflective comments from the professor and classmates have all helped to increase my confidence in my writing abilities. I expect to continue writing these kinds of essays, for personal pleasure if nothing else, long beyond the end of this course.
When this class first met, there would have been almost no way I could have written anything that I thought was creative nonfiction. I am still not entirely convinced, though I believe I have made several strides toward that goal. The body of writing that was required for this course was daunting. We wrote journal entries from prompts in most of the classes for the first two months, which was surprisingly difficult for me. I never felt that I was producing anything worthy of being read aloud, whereas my classmates’ journal entries seemed to be much deeper and more evocative of whatever the prompt called for. I wondered if I was able to make it in this course, if I were able to be honest enough with myself.
I decided that wading in slowly was not the way to approach this course. My first essay, on my problems with anger, mined my darkest thoughts and laid them out for people to see. Once I dove in, the remaining essays became much easier. The second essay I wrote, on my lifelong love of role-playing games and the positive effects it has had on my life. It was fun to reflect on various experiences of role-playing. In revising that essay, I incorporated more of the techniques we studied during the semester, namely segmentation and objective study. I am particularly proud of the third essay, even though I know it needs an actual conclusion and ending. That essay is on a topic I truly care about and think about frequently. In terms of technique, the third essay was heavily influenced by John McPhee’s essay “The Search for Marvin Gardens”. While I struggled with the fourth essay, writing first one and then another draft, I feel that the finished product accomplished something different from any of the previous essays. Now at the end of the course, I feel that I have a better understanding of how to go about constructing a creative nonfiction essay.
The revision process has been something of a challenge. I think my main challenge is trying to disassociate myself from what are very personal topics. It is almost contradictory, or perhaps counter-intuitive, to look at these types of essays so objectively that I can analyze them. I think that the only answer for this is practice. Such analysis of others’ examples will likely help me in revising my own work as well.
The blog was another struggle for me. Just as I was uncomfortable sharing work in class, so too am I uncomfortable with posting anything on the web, especially as there was no way I could limit access. Posting that first essay, on anger, on a blog that theoretically anyone could view was a giant leap for me. I still have some reservations about posting on a blog. I wonder whether there may be legal issues with trying to publish something in print that I previously published on a blog. Still, now that I have grown in confidence I feel better about the blog, and I am thinking of continuing it or creating a new one once the class is over.
I think the main benefit of this course has been to increase my confidence in my abilities as a writer, which have been long underused. Most of the issues that I had at the beginning of the course, including blog posting and prompt reading in class, can be traced back to this lack of confidence. The continued studies of various professional pieces, the practice of writing during the semester, and the reflective comments from the professor and classmates have all helped to increase my confidence in my writing abilities. I expect to continue writing these kinds of essays, for personal pleasure if nothing else, long beyond the end of this course.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Rhetorical Analysis - Granta
Granta is a magazine with a long history, having made several comebacks over a period of 130 years. It was founded in 1889 in Cambridge, England, and published the works of Cambridge scholars. Over the years, it has included works by Sylvia Plath, Ted Hughes, Zadie Smith, Bill Bryson, and Kazuo Ishiguro. It bills itself as “The Magazine of New Writing” and that bears true in the submission guidelines: the magazine accepts only first run works. Otherwise, the magazine publishes essays, stories, poems, and photographic essays on a variety of topics.
In terms of audience and purpose, the magazine is less clear. Beyond a desire to publish only new writing, the magazine’s website indicates that “Granta does not have a literary or political manifesto, but it does have a belief in the power and urgency of the story, both in fiction and non-fiction, and the story’s supreme ability to describe, illuminate, and make real” (http://www.granta.com). Granta publishes both non-fiction, in categories it breaks down variously as “Non-Fiction”, “Reportage”, and “Memoir”, and fiction in each issue.
One item of note with regard to Granta is that each issue has a theme, which may be broad or narrow. The issue currently on newsstands as this is written is #112, is themed “Pakistan”, and contains works by and about Pakistanis and Pakistan, including the land and its people. This issue contained less creative nonfiction. The issue prior, #111, was themed “Going Back”, and contained works that dealt with characters reflecting on past loves, once popular music or styles, and reconsidering the continued relevance of favorite authors. The essays "Mum and Fritz" and "Utterly Dylan" are examples of the creative nonfiction they have accepted.
This may make it sound like the magazine will accept anything, but this is not entirely true. Their submission guidelines are a list of what they will not accept: book reviews, academic essays, straight reporting, genre fiction, or travel writing without a story. The magazine emphasizes the desire for a narrative focus, and a “point”, in all submissions. It also says that some pieces may bend or break these rules at times, but that in general they hold. Granta reminds those interested in submitting work that they receive a huge number of submissions each day, of which they are unable to publish most, despite how well some of them may be written.
As far as the technical elements of a submission:
• Do not submit works previously published in English.
• Submit no more than two stories or five poems at any one time.
• Do not submit by email, as Granta only accepts post submissions.
• Granta will not return unsuccessful submissions, so there is no need to include a SASE.
• Granta does not acknowledge receipt of submissions, and tries to read all submissions within three months of receipt. A response will be emailed after that time indicating whether or not the submission will be published.
• The cover letter need only include a brief summary of the piece as well as where you have published works previously.
• The maximum length is 4000 words.
There is no definite indication of the pay scale of Granta, except that the pay for submissions varies and generally is based on the market rates. The magazine buys at least the world English language rights and first serial rights in unsolicited manuscripts.
Monday, November 29, 2010
Course Reflection
At the beginning of the course, we were asked to consider the definition of creative nonfiction. We were asked that several times, actually, to the extent that the question became almost dreaded. At the time, it seemed like almost anything could be creative nonfiction; however, now I realize that the generalization is not quite correct. I believe I was not making enough of a distinction between subject and style. After reading many examples of the genre, what I would now say is that creative nonfiction is an attempt to understand a particular subject, which can be an event, person, idea, or almost anything really, by examining it and relating to it through personal experience and objective observation. The question of whether or not something is creative nonfiction becomes one of technique.
When this class first met, there would have been almost no way I could have written anything that I thought was creative nonfiction. I am still not entirely convinced, though I believe I have made several strides toward that goal. The body of writing that was required for this course was daunting. We wrote journal entries from prompts in most of the classes for the first two months, which was surprisingly difficult for me. I never felt that I was producing anything worthy of being read aloud, whereas my classmates’ journal entries seemed to be much deeper and more evocative of whatever the prompt called for. I wondered if I was able to make it in this course, if I were able to be honest enough with myself.
To get over this, I decided that wading in slowly was not the answer. My first essay, on my problems with anger, mined my darkest thoughts and laid them out for people to see. Once I dove in, the remaining essays became much easier. My second and third essays were, I thought, much better examples of the requested type of writing. I am particularly proud of the third essay, even though I know it needs an actual conclusion and ending. While I struggled with the fourth essay, I still feel that I have a better understanding of how to go about constructing a creative nonfiction essay. The revision process has been something of a challenge. I think my main challenge is trying to disassociate myself from what are very personal topics. It is almost contradictory, or perhaps counter-intuitive, to look at these types of essays so objectively that I can analyze them. I feel that I need to read more examples of creative nonfiction, to understand better the literary techniques and include them in my own work. Such critical analysis of others’ examples will likely help me in revising my own work as well.
The blog was another struggle for me. Just as I was uncomfortable sharing work in class, so too am I uncomfortable with posting anything on the web, especially as there was no way I could limit access. Posting that first essay, on anger, on a blog that theoretically anyone could view was a giant leap for me. I still have some reservations about posting on a blog. I wonder whether there may be legal issues with trying to publish something in print that I previously published on a blog. Still, now that I have grown in confidence I feel better about the blog, and I may continue it or create a new one once the class is over.
I think the main benefit of this course has been to increase my confidence in my abilities as a writer, which have been long underused. Most of the issues that I had at the beginning of the course trace back to confidence. I hope, by the end of the course (which is fast approaching) to read something in front of the class.
When this class first met, there would have been almost no way I could have written anything that I thought was creative nonfiction. I am still not entirely convinced, though I believe I have made several strides toward that goal. The body of writing that was required for this course was daunting. We wrote journal entries from prompts in most of the classes for the first two months, which was surprisingly difficult for me. I never felt that I was producing anything worthy of being read aloud, whereas my classmates’ journal entries seemed to be much deeper and more evocative of whatever the prompt called for. I wondered if I was able to make it in this course, if I were able to be honest enough with myself.
To get over this, I decided that wading in slowly was not the answer. My first essay, on my problems with anger, mined my darkest thoughts and laid them out for people to see. Once I dove in, the remaining essays became much easier. My second and third essays were, I thought, much better examples of the requested type of writing. I am particularly proud of the third essay, even though I know it needs an actual conclusion and ending. While I struggled with the fourth essay, I still feel that I have a better understanding of how to go about constructing a creative nonfiction essay. The revision process has been something of a challenge. I think my main challenge is trying to disassociate myself from what are very personal topics. It is almost contradictory, or perhaps counter-intuitive, to look at these types of essays so objectively that I can analyze them. I feel that I need to read more examples of creative nonfiction, to understand better the literary techniques and include them in my own work. Such critical analysis of others’ examples will likely help me in revising my own work as well.
The blog was another struggle for me. Just as I was uncomfortable sharing work in class, so too am I uncomfortable with posting anything on the web, especially as there was no way I could limit access. Posting that first essay, on anger, on a blog that theoretically anyone could view was a giant leap for me. I still have some reservations about posting on a blog. I wonder whether there may be legal issues with trying to publish something in print that I previously published on a blog. Still, now that I have grown in confidence I feel better about the blog, and I may continue it or create a new one once the class is over.
I think the main benefit of this course has been to increase my confidence in my abilities as a writer, which have been long underused. Most of the issues that I had at the beginning of the course trace back to confidence. I hope, by the end of the course (which is fast approaching) to read something in front of the class.
Reflective Analysis Rough Draft
At the beginning of the course, we were asked to consider the definition of creative nonfiction. We were asked that several times, actually, to the extent that the question became almost dreaded. At the time, it seemed like almost anything could be creative nonfiction; however, now I realize that the generalization is not quite correct. I believe I was not making enough of a distinction between subject and style. After reading many examples of the genre, what I would now say is that creative nonfiction is an attempt to understand a particular subject, which can be an event, person, idea, or almost anything really, by examining it and relating to it through personal experience and objective observation. The question of whether or not something is creative nonfiction becomes one of technique.
When this class first met, there would have been almost no way I could have written anything that I thought was creative nonfiction. I am still not entirely convinced, though I believe I have made several strides toward that goal. The body of writing that was required for this course was daunting. We wrote journal entries from prompts in most of the classes for the first two months, which was surprisingly difficult for me. I never felt that I was producing anything worthy of being read aloud, whereas my classmates’ journal entries seemed to be much deeper and more evocative of whatever the prompt called for. I wondered if I was able to make it in this course, if I were able to be honest enough with myself.
To get over this, I decided that wading in slowly was not the answer. My first essay, on my problems with anger, mined my darkest thoughts and laid them out for people to see. Once I dove in, the remaining essays became much easier. My second and third essays were, I thought, much better examples of the requested type of writing. I am particularly proud of the third essay, even though I know it needs an actual conclusion and ending. While I struggled with the fourth essay, I still feel that I have a better understanding of how to go about constructing a creative nonfiction essay. The revision process has been something of a challenge. I think my main challenge is trying to disassociate myself from what are very personal topics. It is almost contradictory, or perhaps counter-intuitive, to look at these types of essays so objectively that I can analyze them. I feel that I need to read more examples of creative nonfiction, to understand better the literary techniques and include them in my own work. Such critical analysis of others’ examples will likely help me in revising my own work as well.
The blog was another struggle for me. Just as I was uncomfortable sharing work in class, so too am I uncomfortable with posting anything on the web, especially as there was no way I could limit access. Posting that first essay, on anger, on a blog that theoretically anyone could view was a giant leap for me. I still have some reservations about posting on a blog. I wonder whether there may be legal issues with trying to publish something in print that I previously published on a blog. Still, now that I have grown in confidence I feel better about the blog, and I may continue it or create a new one once the class is over.
I think the main benefit of this course has been to increase my confidence in my abilities as a writer, which have been long underused. Most of the issues that I had at the beginning of the course trace back to confidence. I hope, by the end of the course (which is fast approaching) to read something in front of the class.
When this class first met, there would have been almost no way I could have written anything that I thought was creative nonfiction. I am still not entirely convinced, though I believe I have made several strides toward that goal. The body of writing that was required for this course was daunting. We wrote journal entries from prompts in most of the classes for the first two months, which was surprisingly difficult for me. I never felt that I was producing anything worthy of being read aloud, whereas my classmates’ journal entries seemed to be much deeper and more evocative of whatever the prompt called for. I wondered if I was able to make it in this course, if I were able to be honest enough with myself.
To get over this, I decided that wading in slowly was not the answer. My first essay, on my problems with anger, mined my darkest thoughts and laid them out for people to see. Once I dove in, the remaining essays became much easier. My second and third essays were, I thought, much better examples of the requested type of writing. I am particularly proud of the third essay, even though I know it needs an actual conclusion and ending. While I struggled with the fourth essay, I still feel that I have a better understanding of how to go about constructing a creative nonfiction essay. The revision process has been something of a challenge. I think my main challenge is trying to disassociate myself from what are very personal topics. It is almost contradictory, or perhaps counter-intuitive, to look at these types of essays so objectively that I can analyze them. I feel that I need to read more examples of creative nonfiction, to understand better the literary techniques and include them in my own work. Such critical analysis of others’ examples will likely help me in revising my own work as well.
The blog was another struggle for me. Just as I was uncomfortable sharing work in class, so too am I uncomfortable with posting anything on the web, especially as there was no way I could limit access. Posting that first essay, on anger, on a blog that theoretically anyone could view was a giant leap for me. I still have some reservations about posting on a blog. I wonder whether there may be legal issues with trying to publish something in print that I previously published on a blog. Still, now that I have grown in confidence I feel better about the blog, and I may continue it or create a new one once the class is over.
I think the main benefit of this course has been to increase my confidence in my abilities as a writer, which have been long underused. Most of the issues that I had at the beginning of the course trace back to confidence. I hope, by the end of the course (which is fast approaching) to read something in front of the class.
Monday, November 22, 2010
Audience and Literary Journals
The audience for my work would probably vary. My essays have been all over the place. I expect that the essay on Wildwood would be of interest to anyone who has visited it with any kind of frequency. This is possibly the most widely interesting essay, so I would be comfortable sending it to any literary journal that dealt with travel, or a more generic one like New Letters or Granta, if the theme matches, since almost every issue of Granta has a theme. The others I am not sure about. There were no hits I could find for journals that consider gaming in particular, and so I don't know where I should look for a market for the gaming piece. I don't know quite what "fits" means in this context. I am working on making these essays more like what "literary" readers would like. Ideally they will become the kind of thing that shows up in The New Yorker or Harpers someday.
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